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Post by The Admin on Dec 15, 2005 0:43:53 GMT -5
((odd, it's not letting me edit it... let me try something...))
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Post by The Admin on Dec 15, 2005 0:46:03 GMT -5
((There we go, all better))
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Post by fade on Dec 15, 2005 0:54:28 GMT -5
Chapter One
The wizard Heald coupled with a poor woman once, in the king's city of Mondor, and she bore a son with one green eye and one black. Heald, who had two eyes black as the black marshes of Frybog, came and went like a wind out of the women's life, but the child Myk stayed in Mondor until he was fifteen. Big-shouldered and strong, he was apprenticed to a smith, and men who came to have their carts mended or horses shod were inclined ti curse his slowness and his sullenness, until something would stir in him, sluggish as a marsh beast waking beneath murk. Then he would turn his head and look at them out of his black eye, and they would fall silent, shift away from him. There was a streak of wizardry in him, like the streak of fire in damp, smoldering wood. Ge spoke rarely ti men with his brief, rough voice, but when he touched a horse, a hungry dog or a dove in a cage on market days, the fire wood would surface in his black eye, and his voice would run sweet as a daydreaming voice if the Slinoon River.
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Post by fade on Dec 15, 2005 0:55:17 GMT -5
((yip-ee.......I would hug you if I can but this is virtual))
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Post by The Admin on Dec 15, 2005 22:13:59 GMT -5
((Interesting, very good intro to the character. And I liked the fire metaphor))
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Post by fade on Dec 16, 2005 16:54:27 GMT -5
((thnx.......... XP........I'm still thinking of the rest though))
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Post by Malum on Dec 16, 2005 18:55:31 GMT -5
((Take your time, a good story usually takes time to think up))
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Post by fade on Dec 19, 2005 22:20:02 GMT -5
((okay..))((here's the next part))
One day he left Mondor and went to Eld Mountain. Eld was the highest mountain in Eldwold, rising behind Mondor and its black shadow over the city at twilight when the sun slipped, lost, into mists. From the fringe of the mists, shepherds or young boys hunting could see beyond Mondor, went west to the flat Plain of Terbree, land of the Sirle Lords, north to Fallow Field, where the third King of Eldwold's ghost brooded still on his last battke, and where no living thing grew bebeath his restless, silent steps. There, in the rich, dark forests of Eld Mountain, in the white silence, Myk began a collection of wonderous, legendary animals.
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Post by Malum on Dec 20, 2005 22:44:45 GMT -5
((I love the elusivness of your writing. And the names are interesting. Though there are still grammatick errors))
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Post by fade on Dec 21, 2005 2:56:25 GMT -5
((most of these can be found in books too. Magazines.....I'm not too sure of but I'm sure about some of the books having almost the same gammertick errors....but not all. I've been reading fantasy books most of the time and see it.))
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Post by Malum on Dec 21, 2005 18:40:38 GMT -5
((wait, are you saying that you did write this?))
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Post by fade on Dec 21, 2005 20:44:37 GMT -5
((no,I'm saying that most of the grammer here. I see in other books as well. Some of them are from fantasy and some of them are from other books too. Since, I saw that some other books have this type of grammer and other types of books have other kinds of grammer. I thought that I could mix it up a bit.))
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Post by fade on Dec 21, 2005 20:48:52 GMT -5
((Besides......the rest of it goes a bit off. The beginning is so interesting until the middle it just sxrews up so I'm trying to reread it all until I finally put some more excitement in it. ))
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Post by Mayhem on Dec 21, 2005 20:54:34 GMT -5
((I don't care about grammer- this is good! *gives it her seal of approval* Wonderful!))
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Post by Malum on Dec 22, 2005 22:19:13 GMT -5
((Ah, but what I meant was um that one thing... I have brain problems right now but it's sorta like grammer...))
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